Archives for posts with tag: Self-Sabotage

20140603-225441.jpgSome people would probably like having a refrigerator and freezer full of food. So do I, but it became another lesson for me.

I realized that when I feel a lack in my life, something gets “filled.” It’s almost like emotional eating or its opposite, self-denial.

Yesterday, I came upon a Law of Attraction called the Law of Paradoxical Intent. I really didn’t get it much except that maybe it was feeding my self-sabotage, until that is… I looked inside my fridge this afternoon.

I used to joke that I had a couple of past lives when I was a child who starved to death to explain why I feel the need to always have a stock of food. I love to cook and I share my cooking with others, and most of the time I stock up when there are really good deals, but I realized that I do tend to buy more and stock when I am feeling a lack, and it saddened me, because I have been working so hard on the concept of abundance.

I didn’t know that I had hidden beliefs that were going against what I have been so hard at work to do. I had been self-sabotaging my efforts, feeling less than deserving, so I was filling my life in some way to compensate. Facing that has been interesting, but I am glad and grateful for the lesson, because now I know… and I can turn this all around for me and heal.


You can never have enough! This one is on my refrigerator door, and has been reminding me for a couple of months now.

Do you have one? What does it say?


There are a lot for me to be grateful for today, especially for heat and electricity–these things I shouldn’t take for granted. I must always be aware and thankful that I am in a country where these are easily accessible, but I learned something else important to me.

Yesterday, I wrote about David Steindl-Rast’s TEDTalk on gratefulness. To be happy, we must be grateful and enjoy each given moment. To be open to the opportunity of a given moment, we must slow down and be in the present now.

One of my fears is the future, as it relates to men, love, and relationships. Before I would get too close with a man, I would self-sabotage or end it for many reasons relating to what I had experienced in the past. I had written this fear down and faced this fear the other day, and the best thing I could come up with to deal with it is to fully release the future.

I’ve tried doing that before and now I feel that I have been terribly half-hearted about those other times. When it comes to love when other people are involved, there’s no way of controlling the future. I can’t. I can only control myself.

Plus the only constant is change. What we do today can affect our future, so even if I was told I would meet someone who could change my life in a particular place on a particular day, but decide not to show up (maybe out of fear), for instance, then I lost that chance.

That is why it’s best to just live in the present–in the now, and just enjoy it fully. Let the future take care of itself, and instead, just enjoy the present (the gift) that is the “now.” I get it… now!

So today, I am grateful for “now.” I would like to end this post by sharing these lyrics from Katy Perry’s song, “This Moment.”

Do you ever think that
We’re just chasing our tails?
Like life is one big fast treadmill
And we pop what is prescribed
If it gets us first prize but you know
Who I
Who I think will win
Are the ones that let love in
Are the ones that take the time

All we have is this moment
Tomorrow’s unspoken
Yesterday is history
So why don’t you be here with me?

All we have is this moment
To put our love into motion
Yesterday is history
So why don’t you be here with me?
Be here with me now

Be here with me now
‘Cause the future is right now, right in front of you
Don’t let the clock, the clock tell you what to do
A future is right now, I’m in front of you
Baby don’t blink and miss

This moment


Patrick McDonnell’s Mutts

Mutts comic courtesy of


Yesterday, I was grateful for fear. After writing them down and facing them last night, I actually woke up feeling refreshed this morning (even after several snooze moments.) 😉

It’s weird to be grateful for fear, isn’t it? But I am. I realized that by facing my fears, it will make me become so much more aware of how I still tend to self-sabotage my happiness–and that, Ladies and Gentlemen, I refuse to continue to do.

Now, on to gratefulness!

Being grateful is one of the major components of living a happy and miraculous life, and it was serendipitous that I had received David Steindl-Rast’s TEDTalk on gratefulness last week from my friend, C.

I had meant to actually write about it that day last week, but something else usurped it, but today, I think, is the perfect day to share it and reflect because as David mentioned in his TEDTalk, “if you’re grateful, you’re not fearful.”

David said that we all want to be happy, and this is what we all have in common. He then asked, “is it really the happy people who are grateful?”

He, then, gave an example of comparing a set of people who had everything that could make them happy, but they were not and a set of those who experienced tragedies, yet were still grateful.

“We all know people who have lots of misfortunes that we ourselves would not want to have, and they are deeply happy, they radiate happiness. Why? Because they are grateful… So it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratefulness that makes us happy.”

Have you ever experienced being given something of great value to you and it was fully given with no strings attached? How did it make you feel?

To live gratefully, David said that we need to see every moment as a gift–as “precious” and “a great opportunity.” It is up to us to be aware and to choose to be grateful for each given moment–whether to simply enjoy it or if it is a lesson, to learn from it.

David, then, provides a guide that can help. It is: Stop, Look, and Go

Stop… Slow down so you can perceive each moment and not miss an opportunity.

Look… Use all your senses, see the beauty in all of life, so that you are open to opportunities. Opportunities to enjoy life, to help others, or to learn.

Go… Do something. Enjoy the opportunity that life gives you with each present moment.

Please consider watching David Steindl-Rast’s TEDTalk (link below). It’s beautiful and profound.

I am grateful for, well… gratefulness. For gratefulness will make us happy!


David Steindl-Rast

David Steindl-Rast’s TEDTalk – “Want to be happy? Be grateful”

Image captured from the TEDTalk

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