clearheartLast night, I was helping someone who was in very much emotional pain. The kind that impinged on her self-worth… the kind where all hurts converged and they weighed her down to the bottom of the sea of despair.

While during this painful episode, she did some things that I would call self-sabotage, and wanted to continue to make more like decisions. Those would eventually hurt her even more.

I understand how she felt. I’ve been there before, many times, but here are some things I’ve asked her to do and some things I’ve learned to do to help myself:

1. Remember someone important

You.

We are so much more than what we have experienced thus far. We are worthy of love, blessings, and miracles. We must remember how important we are.

We must remember that only we can love ourselves that way we need to be loved.  We need to love ourselves so much that no one can take that away from us or allow ourselves to give our self-worth and our self-love away.  We can love others so much more, if we have loads of it inside.

If you can’t remember, go to #2…

2. Reach out to someone

Reach out to someone who care about you.  Someone who can tell you the truth to your face when you need to hear it, but can listen and be compassionate, when you need that more.  They will help you remember #1.

3. Do something good for yourself

We need to do things on a regular basis that make us feel good like reading, laughing, cooking, writing, journaling, meditating, running, walking, singing, whatever they may be… We need to do something loving for ourselves, especially when we are in pain.

4.  Don’t make any decisions (especially rash ones) while emotional

We can be our own worse enemies when we are hurt. We can get in the way of our own happiness or do self-sabotaging things. If we decide when we are emotionally in pain, we might make decisions that can hurt us in the end or we will regret.  Wait… Sleep on it.  Wait until you have a clear heart.

5.  Enact a “Feel Good” day

This day (and it could be a few hours) is an uninterrupted “me” time.  Schedule these days as you need them.  These “Feel Good” days are days when you do everything you enjoy and love, unplugged or not.  (You can expand it to be “Feel Good Us” day or “Feel Good Family” day too)

I am grateful to be of help to someone dear last night. I am grateful to share some techniques that may be helpful to you or someone you know, in whole or in part.

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To Have A Clear Heart
Lesson I Learned Yesterday